Hello there!
I’m Darby (she/her), mother of three and passionate doula
I became a doula in 2016 and since then have supported over 80 families during birth, and hundreds more during pregnancy and postpartum.
Originally from Nevada, USA, I moved to Munich in 2005 to study German literature. I never would have imagined life would take me down a path of supporting birth, but I'm so glad that it did!
The birth of my three children and all the births I have supported as a doula have taught me the most essential things I have learned about life, connection, love, and purpose. In my blog, I share all these wonderful and touching experiences.
A tale of three births
All three of my babies where born in Munich, and as I was preparing to birth for the first time, I was worried about the language barrier, even though I was fluent in German. After having an empowering first experience, I learned from fellow parents how the challenges they faced lead to difficult and even traumatic birth experiences. It was then that I realized my bilingual and intercultural skills, as well as my tenderness and empathy, could find true purpose. I embarked down the path of becoming a doula in 2016, while pregnant with my second baby. Read more about my training here.
My first birth made me proud. My second birth made me humble. My third birth confirmed my calling.
My first birth
vaginal & unmedicated
Within moments of giving birth to my first baby, my inner voice shouted out “I did it!” I had hoped for a "natural" birth and had to overcome numerous challenges to bring my daughter into the world without medical intervention. Being surrounded by supportive people and having my preferences heard and understood during birth proved to be the most empowering experience of my life. The confidence I gained from my first birth carried me through the challenges of postpartum and continues to motivate me as a parent still today.
My second birth
learning through loss
At a regular check up just three days after my son's estimated due date, we learned he had no heartbeat. Although my intuition had told me something was wrong as early as a week before, my medical support team assured me he was fine. His stillbirth taught me that there are elements of birth that we can not control - and even medical support can not save us from - as we move along the threshold of souls entering this world. My son continues to inspire me to be a doula and to guide parents to feel held and loved, even during the most inconceivable of outcomes.
My third birth
healing & revealing
Persevering the anxiety of pregnancy after loss and the repetition of complications present in my previous two pregnancies, my third birth was induced at 37 weeks. However, I was given Cytotec, a medication used "off-label," which caused a placental abruption and my daughter had to be born in a 6-minute emergency cesarean section. Although this birth revealed to me the brokenness of the medical system, I gained insight to the strength a mother must have and the love she shows her child when opening up to a belly birth.
My Values
Inclusivity
I consider it essential for all birthers and their families to feel safe and supported as they become parents. In all of my work, I cultivate non-judgmental spaces and use inclusive language. My teaching content is curated to be easily accessible. And I firmly believe that anyone who wants the support of a doula should have it, so I offer my services on a sliding scale when necessary.
Authenticity
I do my best to align my actions with my values and I don’t shy away from tough topics - such as birth trauma and baby loss. I strive to be as transparent with my work as possible while acknowledging my inevitable biases and limitations. I focus on open communication to create connections with the parents I support as well as with midwives and doctors.
Empathy
With heart-centered care, my support not only provides evidence-based care, but ensures that parents feel emotionally cared for as well. This includes trauma-informed care by being sensitive to previous experiences. I extend it to the midwives and doctors, acknowledging the challenges of their work and fostering a collaborative and respectful birth environment for all those involved.